Ape Rifle

Montreal is arguably one of the better places to live in Canada, if not the world. The city mixes together styles, forms and cultures to produce a fascinating scene blending Europe and North America. It is clean, safe and full of that famous “joie de vivre” (translating into “liberal liquor laws” to students all across the continent). It is a city of multi-ethnic neighbourhoods, funky bars, sidewalk cafés, nice parks and lots of preserved historical architecture. And yes, all the signs are in French (How exotique!). Summers in Montreal are particularly alive: the city explodes with energy, street life, festivals and general good times, free from the shackles of those famous Canadian winters.

It was with these thoughts in my head that I temporarily returned home from China in July 2003, ready to enjoy Montreal’s legendary season and a much needed vacation from the Middle Kingdom. The first few days at home I was too busy unpacking, seeing friends and gorging myself on food to pay any real attention to my surroundings. But as time went by, I became increasingly aware of a creeping feeling that, somehow, things were just not right. I couldn’t quite pinpoint the source of my anxiety, but walking around in my once beloved city just made me feel strange. This “bustling” city had somehow become so…quiet. Where was everyone? Even the massive amount of car traffic (very noticeable after living in Zibo) produced little more than a quiet hum. The sky was so blue and the clouds so white I couldn’t help but stare at them. Everything seemed too clean and shiny: a gas station convenience store looked like it could have easily doubled as a hospital operating room. And somehow, everyone seemed rich.

What the hell was this place? It felt like I was living in a commercial. I felt the need to blabber on about this strange experience, much to the annoyance of my friends and family I’m sure. No matter where I was or what I was doing that summer, I had the same thought lurking in my mind: everything seemed too polished, too perfect. Where was the life? The spontaneity? Why were cars stopping at lights? Finally, the source of my uneasiness became quite clear to me. It was simple: I had become addicted to China.

Despite the requisite foreigner bitching about life in China (pollution and a general disregard for hygiene are usually near the top of the list), this place has a sheer energy that is hard to deny. Street life here has the ability to make even a rather large North American city seem like a cold ghost town. The cities are pulsing, and there always seems to be something crazy or interesting going on. The crowds, the chaotic traffic, the pollution, the smells; once you get used to them, they make the place seem so much more…alive. This is not some over-sanitized world, this is humanity unleashed. So when your body accepts these scenes as normal, as reality, it unavoidably experiences severe withdrawal going back to North America and moving several levels down the “craziness” meter. China is a rush, and you can easily get hooked. Once you’ve lived with one sixth of the world, it’s hard to return to the periphery and lead the quiet life.

As addicted as I am, I do realize that I cannot stay here forever. No matter how comfortable I feel, this is not where I want to build my life: this is not my culture, this is not my world. But how to quit China? Can I just do it cold turkey, or do I need a gradual rehab program such as living in Vancouver for a few years? Will I be able to ween myself off this energy level? Or will I need to seek out Canada’s dirtiest, most crowded neighbourhood?

No matter where I am or what I am doing in the future, I have the feeling that my mind will always wander to wondering just what this pulsating world of 1.3 billion people is up to. I will have hopefully long cured my addiction to the Middle Kingdom by then; however, I’m sure I will not be able to erase the feeling that I am, in simple terms, missing out on the action. Would it have been better to just never have come, to have lived my life in blissful, North American ignorance? I don’t think so. The experience has been too valuable, too eye-opening. Better to have loved China and left than to never have come at all.

This isn’t much of a sequel to Ode to Chinese Traffic. In fact, it’s just one picture. Here you go:

My question to the reader is: where do you think
the bus in the left lane is going??? Is it:

a) about to cause an accident
b) about to drive into the trees
c) not going anywhere, because the driver is on his cigarette break
d) all of the above

Vote now in the Comments section!

Heard at a Hangzhou bar all in the same mix:

Bonnie Tyler, Total Eclipse of the Heart
Brian Adams, Heaven
Corey Hart, Sunglasses at Night

(funny, I didn’t notice a “sappy 80s theme night” sign on the door)

Played by the house band at You To Jiu Ba:

Santana, Black Magic Woman (wow!)

First time heard in China..actually, first time heard anywhere!:

Pink Floyd, Another Brick in the Wall pt.2 (techno remix)

WARNING: The following post represents the opinion of an individual who has neither training in complex economics nor much knowledge of the intricacies of the real estate sector. If you feel the viewpoint expressed here fails to take into account this or that number, fact or statistic, then don’t worry: you are probably right, it doesn’t. But then again, this isn’t exactly an academic journal.

The subject of China’s development is unavoidable in the press these days. Despite some fierce competition from the Iraq war debacle, the Middle Kingdom’s drive for economic superstardom has more than held its own in terms of world media coverage. China the Rising, China the Superpower, China the World Factory, China the Paper Tiger, China the Country Where Soon 1.3 Billion People Will Live Luxurious Lives… viewpoints, opinions, predictions abound.

This post, however, will not get bogged down in any detailed analysis of the intricacies of the Chinese economy. Why bother, when it seems that even well-paid, well-trained economic theorists can’t really figure out what’s going on here. (thanks to Dezza for bringing attention to this article on his site) Instead, I would rather address a more tangible aspect of China’s drive for development: urban construction.

It would be a gross understatement to say that Chinese urban areas are undergoing massive renewal. Well, perhaps “renewal” isn’t exactly the right term to use; they aren’t renewing much of anything, rather just building whole new cities and keeping the old name. Actually, “city” isn’t such a good term either: more like densely populated construction sites. Whole blocks are ripped up simultaneously to make way for glorious new towers. Chinese developers do not seem to like the small scale, cautious approach: new projects can easily have 10-15 highrises going up at once. And in a booming coastal city like Hangzhou, there are a lot of projects. As I ride the bus, I pass such wonders as the “City of Civilization” and “Modern City”, massive developments that alone could easily dwarf the downtowns of many mid-sized North American cities. I guess maybe I’m just not used to it, coming from a city that, at most, has had only a few new highrises added to its skyline in the past decade (thank you, Quebec nationalism).

But arriving in places like Shanghai and Hangzhou (or even Beijing), you could be forgiven if your initial impression was that you had ended up on the Jetsons, not in China. Massive glass towers, elevated highways, more massive glass towers, soon-to-be opened new elevated highways,etc. Hardly what most people expect of the world’s biggest developing country. Having not yet been outside a major city or gone inland, you naively ask “How could this be a poor country when many buildings look more suited to colonizing space than sheltering people?”

I remember having a building pointed out to me in Shanghai last year, a massive tower shining bright in the night. As I stared in awe, I was informed that the building was in fact bankrupt and empty. It supposedly had an elaborate automated lighting system set up to make it look inhabited, and thus save the developer major embarrassment. Refusing to believe this story, I quickly chalked it up to urban folklore. However, the next evening, sitting in a park waiting for my train back to Shandong, I witnessed no less that 5-6 skyscrapers go dark at the EXACT SAME TIME. Had I just witnessed a power failure? No, the decorative lights on the outside came on in all their tacky glory. What was going on here? Were these buildings in fact completely empty? Was my cynical friend right?

And these are exactly the kind of questions that still confound me. Sometimes I think I am living in a developing world city with a developed world skyline. Can one really measure the success/economic strength of a city/country by the number of skyscrapers or highrises it has? If you build enough glitzy glass towers, does your population automatically move up to the next level of industrialization? You look up, you see some massive futuristic beast, screaming wealth and power. You look down, you see a dirty migrant worker struggling to get his cart full of trash down the street. Is China in the painful throes of becoming a major economically developed superpower, or is it all just smoke and mirrors, the ultimate triumph of style over substance? If you have any ideas or answers, feel free to let me know, because I sure don’t.

Today was a beautiful day, so I took advantage of the weather and went for a long wander through some little streets and neighbourhoods. As I was trying to nagivate through the elevated highway interchange construction site (it’s currently a mess), I ended up privy to some very surreal scenes thanks to a suddenly radiant late afternoon sun. I’m pretty sure people thought I was insane, taking pictures in such a place. Here are some shots I took.

Sometimes you wake up in the morning, look out the window at the sky and think “Wow…”. Granted, these kind of moments are few and far between in China (thank you, rampant air pollution!). But on the bright side, this means they are all the more memorable when they do occur. Enjoy.

Mondays are usually my day off, but this week I had agreed to do some extra classes for the university out on its new campus. I was to supervise some English Internet classes, in which ideally the students follow online activities and perform basic net tasks in English. Of course, these being Chinese students we are talking about, I ended up having to constantly tell them to switch off Counterstrike, QQ, Sina, Sohu and countless Chinese music sites. I’m thinking that giving them computers with internet connections in class probably isn’t the best idea in terms of productivity.

However, that sidenote is just setting the stage for today’s Interesting Event. As I stayed out there to have lunch with some of the other teachers, I skipped the shuttle bus and took a cab back into the city instead. The new campus is about forty minutes away, so it’s a decent hike.

But it’s an even more decent hike when your cab proceeds to get clogged in a massive traffic jam. We were stationary for a good twenty minutes or so, long enough for people to start opening their doors to get out and attempt to see just what the hell was going on down the road (it’s also during moments like that when the bike lane, with its smoothly flowing traffic, starts to look mighty attractive) I never found out what had caused the block, but after what seemed like an eternity we were finally on our way.

Not for long, though, as on the next block my cab got decently scraped on the side by a passing truck. I guess the driver had lost most of his cool in the traffic jam; he just opened his door and bolted down the middle of the street after the truck! So I was left sitting in the cab, cars flying all around me, as I watched the driver run up to the truck, confront the guy, and proceed to start a shoving match/fist fight.

As the two made their way towards the cab to inspect the damage, I figured it was best if I just got the hell out of there. Although they were no longer fighting, they were still shouting like crazy and in some sort of semi-grapple, so I figured some punches could easily fly again. I gave the driver 50 RMB for his troubles and proceeded the rest of the way on foot, making me late for an appointment ( I was being brought to a primary school “English corner” by my university, which ended up being a lot more fun than I anticipated: the students played instruments, gave me nice drawings and calligraphy, and the whole thing was filmed…I got paid 200 RMB to be entertained!)

Perhaps I was due my yearly China taxi accident. Last year’s accident in Zibo was a lot worse, what with the whole front of the cab getting obliterated by a speeding Audi at a dangerous nighttime intersection. I still think it’s a miracle no one got hurt in that collision. I read here that there were 109,363 traffic accident casualties in 2002; even considering the huge population of this country, that is still a lot. I should probably start wearing seatbelts again ( not wearing one is another “When in Rome…” habit that probably isn’t so great for my health)

I made a return trip to the food festival with some of my grad students and had another great time. Since it was on a weeknight the crowd was much thinner, giving us a much better chance to comfortably sample the goods. Egged on by my students, I also got a little more experimental; they got me to eat donkey as well as silkworms (after eating the latter, a random Korean guy informed me that I was now a real man).

Anyways, I’ve added a few new pics to the photo site. You’ll see some of the famed meat-on-a-stick vendors; these guys are absolutely everywhere in China. My favourite sticks are the lamb/mutton (羊肉串), especially if they are slightly spiced.

A number of the meat-on-a-stick vendors are from Xinjiang (waaay out west, basically beside Afghanistan). Their looks easily distinguish them from the Han Chinese (the main ethnic group in China); in fact, if you met one you would probably assume they were from Afghanistan/Pakistan/Central Asia/Middle East. They are Muslim, and their language sounds much more ‘Arabic’ than ‘Asian’, just as incomprehensible to most Chinese as to myself (but don’t quote me on the Arabic part, I’m not exactly a linguistics scholar). They have come to the Eastern coastal regions in search of work, and you see them in countless cities, usually as street vendors (even in smaller places like Zibo and its surrounding county towns) When you think that they are also Chinese citizens you are reminded that, yeah, this country is a BIG place.

Didn’t do much but hide in my house all day as the temperature seems to have dropped about 20 degrees (yesterday I was in a t-shirt, today I can see my breath). Here comes winter!

Well, not much happened for Halloween, but it was a very interesting weekend nonetheless. On Friday evening I got invited to a barbecue by my freshman English majors. They had rented a ‘campground’ on the West Lake and, despite being smack in the middle of the city, it was actually rather wooded and serene (the lake scenery was pretty ruined by extreme pollution, however). They cooked me up all sorts of meat-on-a-stick delights: beef, chicken, chicken hearts, eggplant, sweet potatoes, more chicken hearts and what I figured to be just pure pork fat. It was all rather tasty, but I was worried that I would be paying dearly for it the next day (hmmm, were they cooking it enough?)

After the food portion of events was done, they got creative: they wanted to start a bigger fire to sing and tell stories around, so they just put all the barbecue grills together and started burning lots of garbage. And what do you know…it worked. Another point for Chinese ingenuity. I was then treated to renditions of Backstreet Boys songs as well as more traditional Chinese folk tunes (it seems like the large majority of Chinese people have decent singing voices..in Chinese that is!) Of course, they harassed me to belt out a tune, but I steadfastly refused, not wanting to ruin the evening.

I just ended up telling them about summer camp and ghost stories around the fire back in Canada, how our counselors used to scare the hell out of our poor little 8 year old souls. It was a really fun way to get to know some of my students a little better. Their backgrounds are quite varied and diverse, some coming from completely across the country. It’s really interesting to hear their different points of view on life in China.

Saturday night also involved lots of meat-on-a-stick delights, but also several hundred thousand people. Hangzhou is putting on a Food Festival at the stadium grounds, and a grad student took a few of us foreigners to check it out. It was really fun, but CROWDED. A little while before the entrance we just ended up in a mass of humanity, which ebbed and flowed us towards what we figured was probably the entrance gate. By the time we had pushed/been pushed there, we realized they were collecting tickets…tickets! shit! We had been completely oblivious to any ticket requirement.
However, it seemed the crowd just kept moving and pushing…whoever had tickets gave them to the attendants, and whoever didn’t just got pushed in for free. Another point for the power of the crowd!

The food festival itself was selling all sorts of wild stuff, everything under the sun from all over China as well as Japan and Korea (and probably a few other countries). We got fried lamb, fried octopus (from Japan, delicious), tons of meat on a stick, some soy/coconut milk, bamboo rice (they cut a bamboo shoot in half and stuff it with sticky rice..DELICIOUS) Trying to buy anything was really a challenge though, as the crowds were really crunching and pushing right in front of the stalls; lines mean nothing here, as usual. At one point we thought a riot was going to break out at the Japanese octopus stall.

We also tried some famous food from Tianjin, they call it “Dog don’t Eat” or something, I loved that name. The food itself wasn’t bad either, basically just a steamed bun filled with meat (pretty much just a small bao zi to the China crowd). But perhaps the star attraction was the ‘exotic’ food: we found one stall selling scorpions, starfish, beetles and all sorts of other insects. None of us were courageous enough to try any of it, but I did get a pretty good picture, check it out at my Yahoo Photos site (link to the right, I’ll be adding new photos pretty regularly)

So after two straight nights eating all sorts of stuff, I think it was pretty much a miracle that Sunday passed without any sort of gastro-intestinal difficulties. I guess my tapeworm took the hit for me.